Keeping My Shit Together

Photo by Jonas Verstuyft on Unsplash

This week has been a whirlwind for me! I started a new job that's full time, and requires to get up around 5 am to get there on time and ready to go.  I'm really enjoying learning new things, and the work environment seems really positive which I'm very much enjoying.

But that also means, for the first time in a while, that I'm actually writing this blog post the DAY that I'm going to be putting it up.

Needless to say, I'm definitely going to have to sit down, look at my schedule, free time, and change it up a little bit so I can keep all my plates spinning gracefully.

But with all the new happening it is really giving me a chance to really find my "why". Not like my big, life-meaning why just the why for my journey towards intuitive eating and body positivity and where I'm wanting to go with it.

For instance, I'm hearing more diet talk now. How people don't want to look like "cows", how they have "never been this heavy in their life" and how they "have" to lose weight before summer time.  On one hand, it makes me sad, because so much of the joy that these people are able to get of their lives is dependent on their weight if they can lose weight, etc.  And some days it makes me see my body a little bit differently some days. I'll start worrying about if my butt looks too gross in my jeggings, or if I should cut back on bread.

But that is where my why comes in. Because I remember those days, where I couldn't really recall what I was doing, but I damn sure knew how much I weighed. The panic attacks when you feel like none of your clothes make you look skinny enough, the cravings for all the foods you can't have and then binging on them because you're just too "weak".

My why is to actually experience my life in the moment, and to love my body and having a healthy relationship with it so that I can experience what I want to instead of letting my weight impact my experiences.

Some days this means I have to go look in a mirror and just lovingly rub my belly and arms and take cute pictures of myself to send to friends to just remind myself that my body is not my end of self. I can still do amazing things, have amazing relationships and have great days regardless of what my body may be doing size wise.

What am I struggling with?

Well, I'm struggling with meal planning. With me working longer hours, and now needing to pack lunches for myself as well, means that this week was a lot of thrown together foodstuffs to make it through the day.  I knew I should probably have some vegetables, but I just couldn't muster the energy when I get home. So I know that to make sure I'm providing my body with things like vegetables, and chicken and stuffs that I will have to probably start to "meal prep" where I cook a whole bunch of shit on a Sunday that way it is ready to go for lunch or to heat up real quick for dinner.

And holy shit is meal prep hard when you are trying to stay away from diets.  Cause I go to Pinterest for recipes like everyone else, and man if you just used Pinterest to gauge what meal planning is for, you would think it was to exclusively lose weight. All sorts of meal planning pins have claims like "paleo! Gluten-free! 21-day fix! Lose weight with meal planning!" etc. and damn it was exhausting.

I just want recipes! Not diet b.s.!

I just want to meal-plan so that I'm not starving at work, and so I don't have to cook a meal when I get home!

But I did find some that I think are gonna be delicious and will (hopefully) hold well over the course of a week.

What am I doing great at?

I'm doing great right now with positive body movement. My new job is a desk job, which means I'm sitting for basically 8 hours.  Thankfully I was taken on a little walk for my first break and I realized how much my body appreciated it, especially after sitting for so long. It really felt good to just stretch my legs. And I swear going outside, even for a little bit helps boost my mood and brain because I get to see the sky, and the sun, and breathe some fresh air for a minute.  So I'm really enjoying that and I think my body is too!


What is your why?  Please share them with me in the comments below!  If you liked this post and you want to start on your own intuitive eating journey, be sure to sign up for my free 7-day intuitive eating guide here!